am back....recently had been working and working.am changing job soon.but dnt have the courage to go for interview.so still struggling.hope to get into sp next year.science course. erm,i had deleted my msn account due to some reason.my bro go into my msn account and anyhow talk to my friends.so i deleted my password and when i want to log in,i realised that i had forgotten my password.this is because everytime i put my password as remember me.so everytime all i have to do is just press sign in.that made it why my bro can access into my msn account that easy.=0 life is just like that.everyday pass by so fast.one more month and there comes the 2008.a new year.and then chinese new year.and there come my extra income.angbao.haha. am waiting for christmas to come so that i can have my extra income from my uncle.because every christmas my uncle will give us ( children) money for christmas as a gift.and the gift is big.in terms of the amount of money given.haha.will not reveal the amount.haha.every year is fixed.but all i can say is high in vaule.haha.=0

=) + =(

today,i went down to rp to sign out of rp.and yes,i am now officially out of rp.
the feelings is happy and relief.but at the same time worried.worried about my future.
but i know that i will never regret my decision.
because this decision i had think and made for a long time.
the road is i choose,the life is i want.the life is mine.no matter what people said,i know this is what i want. i know whatever i do i must tell myself,i cannot regre.so whatever decision i made i will think for a long time or can also said is wishy washy.or like to heed other advice.but most likely will still insist on my decision.
till now,no one even my parents can change my decision after i had made.i hope one day,there will be one who can change my decision or change my attitude towards things and life.
today,is the day i am very proud of myself.cos i am finally very independent that i can settle my own things myself without company of my friends or parents.+)

random......

recently, had been working almost everyday due to my friend chicken pox. and the following week,which is next week,will be working everyday.but after next week will be back to my normal working schedule le.cos my friend is coming back.cannot said my friend is who cos i think is better to keep it a sercret.if not my friend wnt like it de.which means my pay will be more at the end of this month.but more also wnt exceed $500 de.cos the pay is low. but what matter is i like the job.nope should be i like the people in the job.cos if not for the people,i think i would have quit long ago.cos working with them is happy.

happy happy.

yeah,finally going to be officially out of rp.after draging for three weeks of no school since the start of semester 2.tomorrow am going to find the programme chair for the signature in order to sign out of rp.at her class w6.dnt know what will happen.happen when i knock on the door and push open the door scene.and what will she ask or questions me.
but whatever it is after tml,i am free.free of worry.but still have one problem my ezlink card.
and and this is the first time,i settle my own things myself.
in the past,normally there is someone with me or someone to help me with my things.but now,i have to do it.cos my parents said i am growing up.but i dnt wish to.
but since the road and life belong to me and is decided by me.no matter what,i have to do it my myself.cos is my life and the way i want.
in future,no matter is success or failure.it is also me.cos this is what i want and choose.

..............

till now,i still dnt know if i had made the right decision in quitting rp and joining next year sp if can. hope can. i need another chance. this time round i hope i can make good use of the chance given to me.
i really feel that if you are not an independent person,i think rp does not suit you. it is very boring to be in rp.i want to learn something.not just pass my life.
that is why i choose to quit rp.
i had wasted one year of my life.perhaps is half a year.cos half a year spent in rp.
wasted money and time.
hope everything can be smooth for the future ahead of me. =)

finally made up my mind!!!! =)

finally it is over.even though it had not been officially declared that i can break free from republic.but i had not been attending school for a week and is on the way to do all the needed documents and stuff to break free from republic.
i know some may think that it is not a wise choice and is a waste of time and money.
but i had really think through and that i think i really cannot.
in the first place i tot is the relations of people.but it is actually not this way.it is the life of rp that i cannot adapt to.i had try myself to adapt to it no matter what.dnt think of anything.just go and pass each day.but what i want is not like that.i want to learn somethings and i want to do it to the best.and not just pass everyday just like that.
said so much now also no use.since i had decide,i am ready to take any critisim perhaps from relatives or from friends.but i know my friends wnt.cos they are my friends.i believe my friends.
just like they believe me.
thanks for all that encourage me for my decision.=)
my plan for now is to work.maybe find another job to work mean i have two jobs.but is hard to find so i now just stay on in the bubble tea job.
waiting for next year to come and hope to get into sp.now i dnt care what course it is.as long as there is teaching and i can learn somethings even the basic can le.

dilemma????what should i do???

hello!!!! is anyone there?.....i am at the end of the road?? i think is not.i should said at a dillema. what should i do???what can i do??what must i do??? people can only advise.but i does not care to listen to their advice.i dnt know....i am really not in the mood recently if not for this entire year.new life...new environment,new people.new me??? i had begin to become useless,helpless and not me anymore.i dnt know what happen and why. who can i listen to???who can i trust??? retribution???what!!! i want to quit rp.yes,i know this is what i want.at the same time i dnt want to waste money. but my parents they haven help me make the withdrawal from rp.they agreed.but dnt know what they are thinking.all i want is to quit rp and carry my life.wasting my life.wasting my time.wasting my youth.wasting to become useless and helpless everyday. i dnt know what i want.i had lost hope in everything.my self-esteem.the usual me.yes,the usual me.friends??? dnt know who to turn to.family??? i dnt know.hate life.hate myself.hate the world.living in the world of hatred???can i do that.no i cannot,because i care.i care.i care how people see me,how people feel about me,how people said about me,how people want me to be me.what i want.i dnt know. in front of people,i have to be happy.at the back of people,i am not.=(